Waltzing in Shanghai

Weather: Snow

Temperature: -1 c

That was not the first ball I attended. My first ball was the “Law Ball” organized by the law department of Help Institute in 1999. I remembered the ball vividly. Though we all dressed up properly and elegantly and the ball was held at 5-star luxurious ballroom, when it was time to dance, instead of dancing like European elites in the 18th century, we danced like Ah Beng and Ah Lian.

No classical music was played, but techno songs i.e., typical Ah Beng’s favorites.

The same applied to my CLP night: we wore ties and blazers, but when it was time to dance, we were no different from the DVD peddlers.

However, the dinner and dance in China witnessed something different. Believe it or not, I was wearing a tuxedo (the company rented it for us). Corporate image was very important. Nope, we did not dance the crazy frog, we waltzed.

Had I ever imagined learning how to waltz in China? No way.

Doctor vs Lawyer

Weather: Haze
Temperature: 2 c

I had always wanted to become a doctor. It was a childhood dream. I do not know why but since I was mature enough to have to seriously think about my future, being a doctor has always been my first preference.

However, I know my shortcoming: have you seen a color blind doctor? Even if you have seen one, would you trust his diagnosis? Even if you trust his diagnosis, would you let him operate you knowing very well that he thought blood is black color and your skin is green?

Since I knew that I could not be a doctor, I opted to join the second oldest profession, namely, the legal profession.

There are many jokes about doctors and lawyers, and the lawyers always end up being the bad guy in those jokes.

“When a doctor makes a mistake, his patient is buried six feet under; when a lawyer makes a mistake, his client is hung six feet above.”

“One day, a rich old man summoned his lawyer, doctor and accountant to see him. He gave each RM1 million to hold as stakeholder and instructed them to put the 1 million in his coffin when he passes away. 1 month later, the rich old man died. The doctor, being the most honest one, put exactly 1 million back into the coffin. The account, after deducting RM1,000 as his service charges, put the balance sum back into the coffin. The lawyer wrote a cheque in favor of the old man in the sum of RM1 million and put the cheque in the coffin.”

The above joke shows that the doctors are most square minded and honest, without any imagination and creativity; while the lawyers are cunning, smart and not trustworthy.

In real life, that is also true.

When a doctor was caught on tape having sex with the wrong lady using the wrong position (believe it or not, oral sex is illegal in Malaysia, so 69 is definitely out!), he admitted to the public that he was the man in the tape and the woman was a personal friend: as honest as George Washington. There was no any other evidence, apart from the DVD, that could prove his identity. The maker of the DVD was not even known! Yet, this honest doctor decided to come clean and seek forgiveness.

However, when a lawyer was caught on tape trying to fix the appointment of judges and rig the decisions of the court, did he come clean and say: it was me? No no no! Never underestimate the imagination and creativity of the lawyers.

“He looks like me and sounds like me, that’s all I can say” was the lawyer’s standard reply. Was he fixing the appointment of judges and rigging the court’s decision? No, he talked rubbish when he drank too much. Was he talking to the former Chief Justice? No, he could not remember who he was talking to but it definitely could not be the Chief Justice as he did not have the Chief Justice’s number.

Can you tell me that was not brilliant? There were witnesses who testified that they were there with him when he talked over the phone. The maker of the tape confirmed that it was him in the tape. Despite all the concrete and irrebuttable evidence pointing at one inevitable conclusion that HE WAS THE MAN, our friend has the cheek to tell the whole world that “he looks like me and sounds like me.”

Luckily, I did not choose the wrong profession after all. This lawyer really makes us proud and inspires more budding lawyers to be like him.

While we are on this topic, not only the lawyers are smart genius, the judges in Malaysia were not bad too!

When our former Chief Justice was asked why he traveled with Lingam to New Zealand, he said Lingam wanted to tag along and he had no choice. Fantastic! If you are clever enough to believe that, then you would have to believe my story too. My story goes like this:

In 2005, my parents did not follow me to Shanghai for Chinese New Year vacation. I do not know why they were in China at that time. I booked 1 flight ticket and I wanted to travel alone. But when I was in KLIA, I saw my parents. They asked me where was I going and I told them I was going to Shanghai. They asked me whether they could tag along. I said, why not, after all, it was their money. So, my parents followed me to Shanghai. Did they stay in the same hotel with me? Yes, because they asked me where I stayed, so I told them the name of my hotel, and they checked into that hotel. Did we tour Shanghai together? Yes, but it was because my parents wanted to follow me. Did we take group photos? Yes, but it was because my parents wanted to take photo with me. I always obliged.

If you believe my above story then you would also have to believe that my parents waited for me in the KLIA to “accidentally” bump into me with their China Visa ready.

Oh… you don’t believe my story? I certainly hope that the Royal Commission of Inquiry would not…

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下雪了

Weather: Cloudy

Temperature - 1 c

At around 10.30am this morning, while I was concentrating on my work, my colleague who shared a room with me suddenly informed me that it was snowing! Without wasting a second, we quickly wound up the curtain and appreciate the beauty of the falling snow.

The snow got thicker and thicker as the time ticked away. There was I, standing next to the office window with my hands behind my back, enjoy every second of it. Yes, I still had thousand and one things to do, but compared to the gorgeousness of the white flying snowflakes, those thousand and one things could wait.

While looking at the snow, I was overwhelmed with emotions and couldn’t help but wonder how fast time travels. Not too long ago, I was driving my Proton Wira with my former boss and former client Chia to have lunch together and they were complaining about my air-cond – it was not functioning and we were sweating like hell. I jokingly told them if they would spend money to go to a sauna room, why not enjoy the heat in a small car which has the same effect as a sauna room free of charge? Of course, after that “grilling” ordeal, my former boss would not ask me to drive any more; he would rather use his car.

Yes, not too long ago, I was trapped in the heat of the tropical sun, sweating profusely and longing for the cool breeze of Genting Highland. Now, I am standing next to a window in a posh Shanghai office, appreciating the gentleness of the white beauty. It was so cold for the past few days that Engtee and I could not sleep alone – we need our body heat to warm each other up.

Yes, time really flies, and what lies ahead of us is so unpredictable.



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Shall we dance?

Weather: Fog

Temperature: 3 c

From the early 80s to recently, China has gone through tremendous transformation: from international stranger to international player to international leader. I was informed that 15 to 20 years ago, the Pudong New Area (which is now the most advanced area in Shanghai) was nothing but farm land. Please look at the following pictures to judge for yourself what kind of development China has undergone.

Pudong New Area

When more Chinese people are no longer worried about putting food on their tables, they turn their attention to something else. They want to eat better food (really no joke, the world was worried about shortage of animal feeds because the Chinese people are now richer and could afford to consume more protein, i.e. pork, beef, etc). Not only the Chinese now want to eat better, they also want to do something that has “standard” which could elevate their social standing.

Our firm will be organizing annual dinner next week. Since no one in our firm knows ballroom dancing, the firm has specially engaged external dance instructor to teach us how to waltz. Really no joke. After working hour, we stayed back to learn about ballroom dancing.


Still think China is an outdated country? Think again. China is really catching up.






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Let's go to the zoo

Weather: Fog
Temperature: 15 c

Last Sunday, out of nowhere came the idea of going to the zoo. We learned from the map that Shanghai has a zoo somewhere in the western side of the city. We did some research on the internet and went to the zoo by bus.

Frankly, the animals in the zoo were not that amazing save for the pandas and the golden monkeys which we are not able to see in Malaysian zoo, but the scenery was breath taking, especially during the winter. By the way, anyone knows what happened to our Zoo Negara?

Here are some photos we took.

A Flat World

Weather: Fog

Temperature: 10 c

Shortly before my wallet was stolen, I bought a book titled “The World is Flat” for RMB25. Had I not bought that book, the RMB25 would have been stolen anyway. That’s why my parents always say buying books is always the smart choice.

The World is Flat is definitely a good read, especially for those who are involved in the IT sector. This book uses a lot of computer languages like HTML, HTTP, Apache etc which I know nothing about. I ashamedly admit that my knowledge with respect to computer stops at the boundaries of typing documents, checking emails, simple blogging and news browsing.

This book opens my eye wide for I am actually the living example of what the book was trying to say – a world without boundaries. To demonstrate to you that the world today is indeed flat, allow me to share with you a recent project which I was involved in.

Our client was a venture capitalist based in the USA (investor) and was interested to invest in a company established in the People’s Republic of China (PRC), which mainly involves in operating international schools for non PRC residents (target company). The target company was owned by a group of offshore companies which were established in tax efficient territories like Hong Kong, Singapore, BVI, Cayman Islands and West Samoa. These offshore companies were owned by individuals who were scattered all over the world, including USA, UK, Canada, Singapore and Thailand. We were the PRC counsel engaged by the investor to handle the deal while a New York firm was also retained to take care of all the offshore documents. Like wise, the target company also employed a PRC firm and a law firm from Cayman Islands for this deal.

Ok, I hope I have not made things too complicated. To sum it up, the above deal involves people in the following countries: PRC, USA, UK, Canada, Hong Kong, Singapore, BVI, Cayman Islands, West Samoa, and Thailand – fairly evenly distributed across the globe. Now, the first few things we had to do were to prepare a set of transaction documents which involved all the parties. Imagine, 20 years ago when people were still relying on type writers and snail mails, when internet and emails were in the same league with the fairy tales, how difficult it would be for a deal like this to be pulled through? When one party was busy drafting the legal documents, the other party across the globe would still be sleeping. Once a party has finished the first draft, he would need to courier it to all the parties for their review and comment, and it would take a very long time before all the comments could be collected and the next round of revision could be made.

But now, the world has been flattened. The type writers were slowly moved to the museum. In fact, many youngsters today have never used a type writer before! The internet, fax machines, phones, emails, Blackberry etc have made life so much easier. More things could be done more efficiently and cheaply.

With the advancement of technology, the time difference is no longer a barrier but an advantage which we could harp on. When the counsel in New York has prepared a draft document, he would send it to me in PRC via email and thereafter he could go back and rest. I would revise his draft when he was sleeping and by the time he got back to work, my revised draft was already waiting for him in his inbox. No time was wasted at all.

There was once when all the counsels (they were in New York, LA, Shanghai, and Beijing) were required to simultaneously discuss a list of all outstanding issues, all we have to do was arrange a suitable time through emails and the discussion could take place using a conference call. Sometimes, if necessary to see each other’s facial expression, we could even organize a video conference call.

We (the people in New York, LA, Shanghai and Beijing) went though the list item by item to make sure that we did not miss out any loose ends. That was a great experience for me. I witnesses first hand that the world was so flat that I sometimes forgot that the person on the other end was actually talking to me from the other side of the Earth.

Things which were so difficult to be done 20 years ago (e.g. drafting an agreement by counsels from different parts of the world) could now be accomplished in a matter of days. All thanks to the marvel of innovation. This world is moving ahead at light speed, and it waits for no one. I personally knew an American lawyer who is already 72 years old but still knows how to use Microsoft Office to amend contracts.

The Chinese says: learning is like sailing against the tide – if you are not moving forward, you are definitely moving backward.




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Sleeping with the wrong lady

Weather: Fog
Temperature: 0 c

This is my first article of year 2008. To all my readers, I wish you a healthy and happy year ahead. The temperature in Shanghai dropped to as low as negative 3 degrees for the past few days. The surface of the water in the pond was completely frozen.

Initially, I had planned to write about my misfortune on the first day of 2008. Yesterday, Engtee and I went to IKEA to look for something to buy. No, we were not buying anything for our Shanghai place (we do not have any extra space to accommodate more furniture); we were looking for something to bring back to Malaysia.

While we were on our way back to the subway station, I realized that my wallet was missing. I was dead sure that it didn’t fall out accidentally as both my hands were in my pockets all the time due to the cold weather. It could only be the work of a pick pocket. So, fate gave me my New Year gift: a stolen wallet.

Luckily, my guardian angel was looking after me. That morning, before we left the apartment, there was a divine intervention. Something just struck me and I told Engtee we should take out all our personal and important documents such as Malaysian IC, driving license, ATM cards, credit cards etc because we should not carry it around since we were not going to use it anyway. As a result, we took out our Malaysian IC, driving license and other important documents from our wallets and left them in the apartment. Therefore, though my wallet was stolen, I only lost some cash, business cards and my room keys.

Without having to lose my Malaysian IC and driving license did save me a lot of trouble, my biggest headache after losing my wallet was only my room keys. However, believe it or not, the service industry in Shanghai is much more advanced than Malaysia. All I need to do was called up my real estate agent (the one who sourced for my current apartment) and told him about my situation. The next day, he helped me to handle all the procedures for the replacement of room keys. You are not going to believe this: he even paid the fine (RMB 80) on my behalf. Now I have to figure out a way to pay him back the money.

After having “victimized” by the “criminals” in Shanghai, I still think Shanghai is a safe place. At least the thief used some skill to earn his living. Unlike in Malaysia, where the “thieves” need no special skills – they confronted their victims with parang and demanded for money, that’s all. I frequently walked home alone at night at around 11pm to 12 midnight. Honestly, I never felt threatened. But I wouldn’t want to walk alone in Kampung Jawa at 12 midnight, even if you offer me RM100 to do so. Not even for RM1,000 for that matter.

So, I really thought my misfortune on the first day of New Year was going to make headline of this blog: I WAS A VICTIM OF PICK POCKET!! But I was wrong. Something much bigger came up and replaced my headline.

It was about a brave man who admitted having committed adultery. He is none other than our “former” Health Minister, Dr Chua. 2 days after the circulation of the pornographic DVDs in Johor showing a senior politician having sex with another lady, our Dr Chua decided to come clean and admitted that he was the man in the DVDs. At the outset, I must record my admiration for his honesty and courage to face the truth, though the truth really hurts. He could have taken a more shameless and cowardy approach, something which most politicians loved to do: IT WASN”T ME. I WAS FRAMED!!! Outright denial often seems to be the normal knee-jerk reaction for most of the shameless politicians.

Dr Chua came out of nowhere in 2004, after taking over the ministerial post from another Chua – Chua Jui Meng, his political career rose like a helicopter. People were speculating that he might one day challenge the post of Deputy President and thereafter, the President. He was a star in MCA.

I admit that I am not a fan of Dr Chua, not only because he is a member of MCA, but also because of how he had handled the “Negarakuku” incident. Not that I had high hope for a MCA leader, I thought he could have done better.

This morning, he had resigned from all his position in MCA and Government – obviously a difficult choice for him as he has said less than 24 hours earlier that he would not resign. Anyway, let’s discuss this: do we have any business in his personal life? He could have been a fan of threesome for all I care, but if he had done his duties right, should we ask him to resign?

I was all for Bill Clinton when he wrongly placed his cigar. My argument then was: Why impeach a good president when he could deliver?

However, Malaysia is not USA. Malaysians “officially” could not tolerate adultery. If Dr Chua were a Muslim, he would have been dragged to the Syariah Court to face charges. Luckily, being a non-Muslim Malaysian, he has all the license in the world to screw any ladies of his choice, the only legal consequence I could think of is that it creates a justification for his wife to petition for divorce. Further, if he continues to be our Health Minister, will he be able to speak with conviction and confidence the next time he convinces the people to avoid extra-marital sexual relationship as a measure to prevent AIDS?

They said the position of Health Minister is cursed. One will end his political career after sitting on that chair. Lee Kim Sai and Chua Jui Meng, among others, had proven that. Now, will we see the comeback of Dr Chua?

I doubt so.

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