Am I a Chinese?

Weather: Fair
Temperature: 11 c

You may be thinking: what kind of stupid question is that? My father would probably knock my head and shout: are you crazy? Of course you are Chinese!

But before you start jumping, please let me explain, there are more to it than just a simple stupid question.

In Malaysia, though sometime I did want to just be a Malaysian, my country had repeatedly reminded me that I am a Chinese. When I fill in the form for my PMR exam, I have to disclose whether I am Malay, Chinese, Indian or others. What has that got to do with the exam which main purpose was to test my academic ability was way beyond my comprehension. The same applies when I applied for IC, when I made police report, when I applied for passport, I had to tell the government that I am a Chinese. Speaking about applying for IC, please allow me to digress a little bit.

When I applied for MyKad, I was asked to fill in my religion. I told the officer I have no religion, so please state “tiada”. The officer looked at me as if I just told her I have raped someone. She said, “tak boleh, mesti ada.” She was actually right. In her computer screen, there is no “tiada” for her to click. I must give one, if not, they can’t process my application. From her perspective, being a Chinese, I must be either a Christian or a Buddhist. Well, I believe in Charles Darwin and natural evolution, therefore, I couldn’t be a Christian and I do not want to insult Buddhism by claiming to be a Buddhist since I am a fan of sirloin steak, I kill mosquitoes, tell lies, watch blue movies and drink beer occasionally. Why can’t I just be a “orang yang tiada ugama”? Nope. Even the #1 Rukun Negara tells us to believe in God. I may be stripped off my citizenship if I live in a state of godlessness.

Since I am definitely not a Christian, I reluctantly told her to click Buddhism. She was relieved, she said, “so, you Buddha lah! Senang kan?”. I don’t think she understands the difference between being a Buddha and a Buddhist. So, I ended up becoming a “Buddha” against my will.

Now, coming back to the issue at hand. Not only the government constantly telling me I am a Chinese, even the private sector does the same practice. When I registered my prepaid mobile number, I have to tell DIGI I am a Chinese; when I opened bank account, I have to tell Public Bank I am a Chinese; even when I filled up forms for security guards to guard my house, I have to say I am a Chinese.

So, in Malaysia, I am a Chinese first or Malaysian first? If I am Chinese first, why did I support Malaysia’s badminton team when they played against China? Oh, that’s because I am Malaysian. But, if I am a Malaysian first, why can’t I enjoy the 10% discount when buying property? Oh, that’s because I am Chinese. I am confused here.

Ok, now I am in a land full of Chinese, 1.3 billion of them. The question is: am I still a Chinese when I am in China?

Again, let me digress for a while. I had a chat with my brother this morning and he was surprised that he needs a visa to come to China. “We are the descendants of the Dragon!” he claimed. Yes, we might be. But we still need a visa to come to China because the last time I checked, our passports do not have a Tiananmen logo on its cover: only 2 skinny tigers.

It’s funny. My country keeps on telling me that I am a Chinese, while China keeps telling me I am a Malaysian, a foreigner. I am not even a “华侨” (oversea Chinese). Surprised? The sad stories of Malaysian Chinese: our government treats us like outsiders from China, when China doesn’t even recognize us as Chinese from Malaysia – we are just foreigners from foreign countries. Period.

Hence, back to the title of this article: Am I a Chinese?

While you are pondering over this question, do you know that the Hongkee call us “马来仔” and “马来妹”? To them, we are not too different from the Malays, at least in terms of labeling.

p/s:- what has happened to the collapsed building in Tasik Banding? Any idea?